He's no janitor

I know, I know.. I'm spending way too much time blogging and messing with my blog tonight, but Justin's at work and I'm bored. :)

I just read my devotional thingy for the day and really liked it. I want to share a piece of what it said.

Stop treating God like a janitor you call when you've made a mess and need someone to clean it up; or as your "go to" person when you need something you can't otherwise get. Don't go to God for a miracle, go for a relationship- and you can walk in His miraculous provisions every day.

"He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty" (psalms 91:1). Note the words "dwells" and "abide". Instead of commuting in and out, stay in contact with God and all that He has will be available to you.

Okay, that's it. No more blogging for me. At least until tomorrow!

Goodnight!

Rain, Rain, Go Away!

I like sunny, breezy, 75 degree weather.
I'm not liking that it was sunny, breezy, and 75 only 2 days ago, but is now nasty, rainy, and 40 degrees.

I need this raining nastiness to leave because I wanna go see my momma tomorrow for her birthday. For any normal person, rain wouldn't be a factor. But I'm not normal.
I absolutely hate driving in the rain. It scares me. I have to go slow and hold onto the wheel with both hands at the 10 and 2 positions while hunched over as close to the windshield as possible. Yes, I'll drive around town if it's raining and even get on the interstate if I need to. But I'm not about to drive 45 minutes in the country with no cell phone service in the rain. No thank you!

So, please, rain... just leave!!!

Happy Birthday, Momma!

Today is a special day to me.  It's the birthday of a lady that is simply irreplaceable to me... my mother.  She is very special and dear to my heart.  I love her more than I know how to say.  I wouldn't be who I am today if I hadn't had her in my life.  She has been so strong for me through so much.  I didn't realize it when I was young, but now I do.. she made so many sacrifices for me.  She would give up just about anything to make sure I was happy.  I have a feeling I will be a good mom some day thanks to the example she gave me.  It wasn't always easy, and we had our fights, but I wouldn't trade my momma for the world.

My mom lives about 45 minutes away from me now, which neither of us are happy about. I wish we still lived close so we could have mommy-daughter lunch dates, movie dates, park dates, and afternoon visits.  But for now, I'll just visit as often as I can and be thankful for how blessed I am to have her as my mother.

Happy Birthday, Momma!!!  I Love You!!!

I Feel Like Being Random Again!

My student teaching evaluation went pretty well.  I had my little ones paint with scrubber sponges that I found at the dollar store and play with play dough.  My teacher gave me good scores and said that she thought I was doing a great job.  She even said she thinks I was too hard on myself during my self evaluation.  That was nice to hear!

I think I'm really going to like the dollar tree when I'm teaching in my own classroom.  They had a bunch of little stuff that I could put to use for different activities!

*

The in-laws rented this movie the other night and let us borrow it.  They know that I'm a freak about movies, and Justin even likes ones that are based on a true story.  We usually try to stay away from rated R movies, but I have really been wanting to see this since I saw the previews for it.  And since Justin's parents watched it, they could tell us what to expect as far as language, violence, and all that.  I can't wait to have time to sit down and watch it.  Anyone seen it?  If so, what did ya think?

*

I've been debating about writing this next little section for quite a while now.  I don't mind being personal on my blog, but since I don't know who all reads this that I know personally, I've been holding off on writing this.  I don't want to get anyone thinking anything wrong or get any rumors started.  I've finally decided though, that this is my blog for things I want to remember- so I'm writing whatever I want!  Ha!

For the past several months I have had a touch of baby fever.  I know we aren't ready yet, and I'm okay with that.  But it doesn't change the facts.  I feel like I'm ready to be a mommy.  I've always wanted to have children.  A mom and wife are the only two things I really want to be when I "grow up".  Lately, it's been apparent that the time must be getting close.

I walk through the baby section everywhere I go.  I read books about pregnancy and parenting.  I spend time looking up baby names and their meanings on the internet .  I have a closet full of baby clothes and other baby items that were given to me by my sister.  I have a bookshelf dedicated to baby and children's books.  And lastly, I have been dreaming about babies, my babies, ALOT.

I have dreams at least once a week where I'm either pregnant or just had a baby.  I have had dreams about having twins many times and even triplets one time.  (God help us if that's true! ha!)  Last night was the most vivid of them all.  We had just had a baby girl in the local hospital.  We were trying to decide on a middle name.  And I was up taking pictures of her with the camera I just got for Christmas.  All of my family was there with us.  It was very real.

I wonder when our time will be?...

*

My sister and her little family went to Georgia to visit with Dom's dad and his family.  I miss them bunches.  I can't wait to see this little face again. She's so pretty.  Even in the bathtub.  :)

It's been a while..

Almost a week since I've posted.  What's gotten into me?!  I hate that I've been a bad blogger, but I'm just too darn busy!  Like right now for instance, I need to be studying for a midterm that I have tonight and then showering and then eating dinner and then picking up the house.  Oh well, it can wait.

Just a couple of quick updates--

*Today I'm starting a new diet.  It's embarrassing the amount of weight I've gained in the past year and half, therefore I will not mention that enormous number here.  Just know that it's ALOT.  And starting today, I WILL get rid of some of it.

*I recently decided to volunteer at the church doing Children's Ministry.  I'm pretty excited about it.  My first time will be not next Sunday, but the next.  Woo-hoo!  I know I'm called to work with the kiddos, so this is my first real step in that direction!

*Justin got laid off from his day time job.  It's a bummer, and money is tight... but we are trying to see it as a good thing.  Now he has more free time to get involved at the church.  He is starting some new things as well.  I just don't know all the details yet.

*We have an opportunity to do missions this year!  The trip is to Honduras in September.  That is all I know so far. I should find out more details soon.  I'm really hoping (and praying) that we get to go!

*One of my bestest girlfriends, Penny, came and visited me today for the first time since I got married.  It was fun to catch up.  I miss her alot.  We were BFF for a long time.  I even lived with her and her family for a while.

*Midterms are this week.  I don't like that idea because it means I have extra work.  But I love it because it means I'm almost done with school!!!

 

And just because I like to have pictures in my posts---

real thoughts...

***This is gonna be a long one***

I finally have some time alone.. some free time.  (I do have class in 2 hours, but I don't want to think about that just yet.)

I still haven't figured out exactly what is going on in my spirit/mind/emotions/heart right now.  All I know is that I'm being changed.  It's not an easy process either.

For the past 3-4 years I have been a Christian.  Although I grew up in church and loved Jesus, I didn't really give my life to Him until much more recently.  And only in the past 2 years have I really started having a daily personal relationship with Christ (which in my opinion is what being a Christian is all about.)  I read my Bible.  I talk to God about things big and small.  I pray for myself, my family, my friends, and others in need.  I go to church regularly twice a week at least.  I have been involved in small groups.

BUT something has not been RIGHT.  Lately I just feel this extra burden in my spirit.  Something tugging at me.

I know I'm not living my life in a way that completely glorifies God.  Sometimes I get caught up in the busyness of my life and start just "going through the motions".  I go days at a time without spending time with my Creator.  I don't treat my husband good.  I don't put others before myself.  I can be plain out rotten to be honest.

However, I know I'm called to more.  I know that I'm called to walk as He walked.  I'm called to be loving, joyful, patient, kind, forgiving, merciful, faithful, etc.  I know that I'm called to be a Godly wife, mother, sister, daughter, friend, teacher.  I know that I'm called to share God's Word and His Love with those around me and those on the other side of the world that have never heard His name.

My question lately is "how do I get from HERE to THERE?"  There's a huge difference between where I am and where I need to be, where I will one day be.

Although I still don't have it figured out, the Lord has been speaking some things to my heart.  He's been telling me first of all that in order to see a change in my outcome, I must first change what I'm putting in.  If I continue doing the same things, I'm not going to see changes in my life.  For me, this means that I need to change how I spend my time.  I need to spend less time watching TV and movies, less time on facebook and myspace, less time reading blogs, and more time focused on my Savior. 

He's been telling me that I need to stop focusing my attention on the troubles in my life.  I am one to always look at my storms/battles/problems.  But instead I should be focusing my attention on the positive things in my life.  I need to be thankful for all that I do have.  I am blessed beyond measure.  God is so faithful to Justin and myself.  He has never let us down.  Ever.  It's so easy for me to say that and know it is truth, but when hard times come it's not so easy anymore.  Well, my goal is to push myself to be more positive in all things.

He's been telling me that He is that same as He always has been and always will be.  If I could trust Him so many times before, I can trust Him again.  And again.  And again.  And again.

He's been telling me (and this is one of my favorites!) that if I'll do my very best, He will do the rest.  I don't have to be perfect or near perfect. I just have to desire to be better and put myself completely out there, and He will meet me where I am.

 

I always see great speakers, great musicians, great singers, great prayer warriors and honestly I want to be like them.  I want to be a person that leaves a mark on this world when I leave it.  I want God to use me to turn peoples' worlds upside down.  I want people to see Jesus and His love shining through me.

But am I willing to do what it takes to see those things come to pass in my life?  I haven't been.  But I feel like that is where I'm going.  He is preparing my heart and my mind to take that next step.  I'm definitely not there yet, but I'm happy to be on my way.

 

and just for fun, an old pic

busy, busy

Since my last post I feel like I haven't had ANY free time to get alone with God. I hate that. And the worst part is, I'm gonna be busy all week. I still plan on praying and reading as usual, but before I write about what all is going on I want to really spend quality time focusing on what He is trying to say and do.

I'm so busy because.... well, for one, school is nuts-o right now. Next week is midterms, so I have alot of work to get done for all my classes. Student teaching is taking m0re time now because I'm having to write my own lesson plans.
Oh, and to top off all the normal weekly stuff (school, student teaching, cleaning house, cooking, spending time with my hubby) we decided to have a garage sale this weekend. And yes, we just started getting ready for it today!!! It's hectic to say the least. But we have lots of junk to get rid of and can for sure use some extra cash.


Total change of subject-- I bought some rugs online for my living room. They came in today and totally do not match. They look nothing like they did in the picture on my computer! Grrr... Now I'm back to square one on that too!

Sorry about all the complaining. Just ignore me. I'll be fine! haha :)

Have a great day!!!