our miracle

 

**written Jan. 17, 2010 8:50 pm**

Today would have been the beginning of cycle #6 for us. But looks like that cycle isn’t coming. 

Let me back up…  After several disappointing months, Justin and I decided to take the month of January “off”.  We just weren’t going to try hard to get pregnant.. no charting and counting days, no vitamins, etc.  I was nervous about skipping a month knowing that it could be the month, but we both really felt like it was the right thing to do.

Now fast forward to today.  I was at work and sent my friend Jenna a text saying that my cycle was expected this morning, but hadn’t shown up.  I told her if I didn’t see anything by Wednesday I would take a pregnancy test.  However, she kept talking to me and pretty quickly persuaded me to test today. 

When I got home from work I told Justin about everything and that I still had no signs or symptoms that my cycle was starting.  I went into the bathroom and took a test, left it on the counter, and went back into the kitchen to talk to Justin and have a snack.  After a few minutes I decided it was probably time to check the test.  In all honesty my hopes were pretty low, especially considering it was our “break month”.

But.  I saw 2 lines.  TWO.

I was in shock.  All I could say was “oh my gosh!, oh my gosh!”  Justin thought I was playing a joke on him, and I told him to come see for himself.  As he walked toward me in the bathroom I started laughing so hard.  That laugh quickly turned into tears.  I was bawling.  But they were finally tears of joy.  Justin just grabbed me and hugged me tight.  He was pretty much holding me up too.  I was crying and shaking so bad that I could barely stand.  I knew I was pregnant right away.  I had read several places that it’s not very often someone gets a false positive.  Justin, however, wasn’t so sure.  We decided I should test again with a digital test.  I drank an entire bottle of water plus some juice and waited and waited and waited.  Finally I felt up to testing again.  This time Justin saw the test first and said, “you’re pregnant!”  Seeing the word “pregnant” just made it seem more real. 

We immediately grabbed our phones and started calling family and the close friends that have been praying for this baby with us.  (I have to add here that both of my grandmothers said immediately that they think we are having twins…. time will tell!)

After what seemed like a billion calls, texts, congrats, etc., we decided it was time to celebrate.  We stopped by Dustin and Jenna’s house and were greeted with pom poms and hugs and bunches of happy talk.  Then Justin’s dad bought our dinner at Salt Grass Steakhouse.  It was so yummy!

 

I can’t adequately put words to my feelings right now.  I am still a little in disbelief.  I doesn’t seem real.  It’s too good to be true.  I’m crazy happy.  I feel like I’m dreaming, but I guess it’s a dream come true :)  I have waited so long for this day.  I have prayed so hard, cried so many tears, and have had to learn what it means to really trust God.  It’s been hard, but today I can say that it’s been worth it.

We know that this baby is a gift from the Lord.  This baby is a miracle.  I feel so honored and blessed that I get the chance to be a mother.  Wow.  I guess calling myself “mother” is gonna take some getting used to!  Haha! 

According to my calculations I’m almost 4 weeks pregnant.  The due date is around the end of September.  Hopefully I’ll get an appointment with a doctor soon and get more details.  I seriously plan on treasuring each and every day of this journey.  I hope to blog about it a good bit too so that I can look back on it after it’s over.  I know that this next year is going to be one of the most special years of my life.  Today especially will be a day I never ever forget.